Emerald Flight: Homecoming: Return to Grace (continued)

The scenes on the screens inside had been replaced by slowing scrolling lists of instructions and orders. Elizabeth paused before one, but, as she expected, her name was not yet listed for any assignments. It would still be several weeks before the Emerald Flight headed out again, so it was unlikely that any of her crewmates would draw immediate assignments.

On a few of the smaller displays, particularly those that people carried with them, she could still see replayed scenes from the catastrophe on Mars. She tried not to stare, looking away when she thought someone else might have caught her looking. Walking slowly through the large reception area, she found herself hesitating as she neared the wide stairway that led up to her room.

She did not want to be alone just then, and yet she was. Surrounded by fellow officers and non-commissioned personnel, she still felt as though as though there was no one she could go to. It was the first time since being on leave that she had profoundly missed being aboard the ship. She could have visited the Chief down on the Engineering Deck, even if on a pretense. (She suspected that he was rarely fooled by those errands.) Captain Devereux would have been there, calm and confident. Even Lieutenant Hawkes would have been a solid, comforting figure. Hell, she would have found Hope’s presence reassuring under these circumstances.

Standing alone near the polished railing, she felt a renewed wave of anger toward Jackson. He had just disappeared on her, without even a word. And she had let him sleep with her. That it had been mutually consensual was beside the point—he could have shown little more chivalry toward her. This was why, she decided firmly, most officers avoided personal relationships.

She stared up the wide expanse of stairs. Her room was up there, empty. It probably still smelled of Jackson . . . of both of them. For the first time that night since the crisis began, Elizabeth wanted to cry. She felt the tears prickle at the corners of her eyes. Rushing against the growing haze in her vision, she moved quickly toward her room.